born

All the things a person could ever hope to have or achieve in life I have had, from the day I was born. From two people who loved each other, loved God and country, I arrived into this wrecked world. I was sick and would not have been able to live, except for the skill of a man who trained and studied hundreds and hundreds of hours to unlock the passion God hid inside of him-saving lives. I was dealt the kind of crushing blow that obliterates the strength of great nations, but there was a God Who planned the days of my life before I was even born, and He had a solution waiting in time. I was poisoned with anger. It weakened my character and I strayed from who I was made to be. But, even then, there were people who were put in place long before I was even thought of, who loved me even when I hated.

It is completely inconceivable the planning and wisdom that goes into shaping and fashioning a person, like you, like me. But still we choose to doubt, to neglect, to run and hide. How is that? Even in this wrecked version of the earth, order, beauty, and truth surround us all. We are so finite, and adulterous. Yet we breath just the perfect oxygen and nitrogen mixture of air that gives us life. We cannot understand that the ugliness and horror we see and experience was not His original intent. Beautiful walks in lush gardens, talks about fulfilling His plan for us, enjoying the friendship and love of a Maker so devoted to the crown of His creation was what He had in mind. All we, like sheep, are stupid and willfully obstinate to the eternity inside us.

So we entertain that hiss, that whisper of diabolical defiance. We reach out and grasp that fruit, that one fruit, and ignore all the other thousands of experiences that are within the scope of faithfulness, righteousness, and love toward our Maker. We put it to our lips, and bite. The succulence fills our senses, and it tastes so good, feels so right. Stepping further and further away from the source of our energy, our light, our wisdom, our life, knowing fully the consequences, we walk resolutely into our demise. The stench of death envelopes our thoughts, our intentions, everything becomes tainted. Perhaps we thought death was the complete absence of anything. But like the first people, we're surprised to find it goes on and on while we still breathe, living in the pain of bad choices, unbelief, and sorrow. Yet that hiss convinced us that "You will not surely die..." what a damned lie. We die looking around, being married, raising our kids, in death, a life that is not. Until we see that we have to really die... to all we think we know and understand.

Reaching up, with tears streaming down, feeling the warm welcome a Holy kind of Spirit moving over us, through us, calling us up to life lost. We don't know what we thought we knew, not at all. But the one thing that is real at that moment is a stream of light pouring into the darkness of our dead lives. It is the Voice calling, "Adam, Adam, where are you?" Except this time, the separation disappears, and we can answer sincerely, "Here I am, Lord." He knew it all along. He just had to set some things straight with our relationship first, which, consequently meant taking the punishment we deserved upon Himself, shedding every drop of His blood for all people, most of whom will never come out of their willful and deadly defiance. But He did it anyway, because that is Who He is.

Our hand touches his outstretched hand, and all of a sudden, we are born, again. And a whole new life begins with all the wonder and possibility He meant there to be in it. Incredibly, what we need is there when we need it. Our longing begins to fill up with a deep satisfaction never imagined. Ahhh, unreal, really.